Bourbon's

Today, I cracked the second party pack of Bourbons. Bourbon's are cookies that I discovered in India. Well, not so much discovered as was introduced too. Let me tell you, in India, I was loving these cookies. So much so that I bought two party packs and brought them home. I have to say they tasted better in India. I wonder why!

These pictures are from our first day or two in Delhi. The view? That is from our hotel. The street? That is the street our hotel was on. The dog up above? Who knows, just a nice dog that was near our hotel and clearly wanted its photo snapped; I obliged.






The lotus temple (below). It was a nice spot in the middle of the Delhi chaos. So calm and peaceful. We gave up control of our shoes so we could enter the temple. It was well worth it. The temple was quiet and offered us a moment to relax and reflect. I wanted to scream. The roof line would have made for an entertaining echo!










On the same day we saw India Gate. Here it is without all the tourist brochure photoshopping. It was well worth the stop. We milled around and took pictures. The children love having their pictures taken and both Taren and I were happy to do it.




As for the Bourbons. Well, I have three quarters of the party pack left in my cupboard. I will eat them. If you want one, let me know and we can share one. A little taste of India. And, if you are really lucky I could make some Masala tea to go with them. All you have to do is ask.

My Shirt has Spaghetti on it!

I'm Home

I have been back just shy of a week. I was exhausted after my journey home and I caught a cold. The past couple of days I have been taking it easy, eating well, and resting.

India is fading into my memory and today I was actually thinking about going back. Is that something I would ever do? I am still undecided. The pollution puts me off, as does the constant badgering from people wanting money. However, I would like to see the south and, more so, Leh Ledak.

I was reviewing some of my pictures and I can see in the pictures the contrast and contradiction of India. The amazing beauty reflected in the Taj Mahal and the incredible mess, reflected here in this street picutre.

On the way home I spent about 2 hours in Paris. What an incredible place, and such an oasis after my time in India. I wandered the streets, not straying too far, as I had a plane to catch and the threat of rain was looming. I did find a wonderful street with little cafes and food shops. I love the picture of the shop with the little dog tied inside. He is waiting while his owner shops. Here are the first pictures of Paris.

I also wanted to share these two photos. Because one shows my travelling friend Taren, at the Taj Mahal, and the second shows Taren, Alanah and Sarah. Take in that photo and how these women stand out, 3 beauties among the chaos. We eventually lost site of them as their ricshaw driver raced away ahead of us. We did, finally, catch up to them back at our hotel.

Agra

I saw the Taj Mahal. What an amazing place. It is just spectacular. When I get home I will post my pictures. Well, not all of them I took well over 100 pictures of the place! The Taj has made this whole trip worth the effort and pain! :) Off to Varanasi tonight on the overnight train. 3 days there and then back to Delhi.
I am looking forward to being home...

Jaipur Day 2

We had a good day. We went to a paper factory, textile factory and a pottery factory. We met some local people and had tours of each place by the people that run them. We then went to see the Hawa Mahal. Interesting place, although, it too, is falling apart. It is sad really.

I am back feeling like I want to leave. I need fresh air! I need a good meal. When I buy groceries I want them to be clean! Oh well, when in Rome, as I keep saying.

Tomorrow we leave for the Taj Mahal. We are catching a train at 5am. I think the trip is about 5 hours. That should be a breeze! I am looking forward to the Taj and we all have agreed the 750 Rp fee to get in is worth it. How can you come all this way and not go in?

I am off now. I am only paying for 30 minutes of Internet time. I am going to go relax. Update again when I can.

Pushkar

We left this morning and not a moment too soon. This little town in the mountains is the Holy City. Interesting rules like, men and woman cannot embrace in public. You cannot take pictures of anyone in the lake. This is the holy city of India.

Right.

There are drugs on every corner and anything else you may want to get into it. Apparently it has the highest rate of HIV in the country. Lots of foreigners go there just for the drugs and sex. The dirty gypsy look is high fashion. It had an under tone that I happen is behind us.

We took our last bus trip. 4 hours. It was the express bus so it only stop 92 times! The roads are fun if you are into racing and playing chicken. We are now in Jaipur. It is another crazy city. I was a bit disappointed with the Hawa Mahal. It is not such a grand palace. It is right in the middle of the chaos!

Our time is drawing to a close and I am looking forward to heading home. However, there is still the Taj Mahal and Varanasi. I am looking forward to both. And with any luck Paris.



This picture was taken by Taren. It is us at the top on a mountain. There is a temple behind us and we climbed all 2000 steps to see the sunrise. We were worn out and wondered why the hell we did this. A 5am climb in the dark up the side of a mountain. In the end it was worth it. One good memory from Pushkar...

In the picture left to right... Tom; me; Krishna; Sarah; Shivani; Taren

Udaipur India

We are on day 9 of our journey. This city, Udaipur, is a beautiful place. The Lake Palace is amazing and is the home of the current Maharahan - I am not sure I have that term correct but it means he is the King of King's. His Palace is an oasis of peace in this very busy city. Having said that, I must say, that Udiapur is actually peaceful in comparison to the places we have been. Perhaps it is the lake, or the gardens, or simply that I am coming accustom to the many tuk tuk's and motorcycles.

Tomorrow morning our journey will continue. We all meet at 5am to catch the train to Pushkar. I believe it will be a 5 hour trip. We are all thrilled that, on this ride, we will have access to a washroom! It takes some planning to ride a bus for 10 hours with only one pee break!

Today, I am taking it easy. I am attempting to get rid of my cold. It has become a night time cough and I would like to shake it off. Everyday is so full of activity and rest, is really, not part of the agenda. I left Taren at the Palace and I headed back to the hotel. I met up with some others from our group and had lunch. I had a brownie with ice cream! Is that a lunch? It was a fortune at 250 RP's! Buying any kind of imported drink is very expensive (before you get on my back about having a brownie while I am suffering with a cold, that is the exception. We had a great breakfast at the home of our tour leader. And, for the most part, I am eating well).

But enough of my lunch choices, back to the adventure of India.

The strangeness of India is starting to change. The other day while shopping, one of the girls casually said to Taren, "watch out there is a cow coming". They both kept on shopping without giving that a thought! I laughed and thought, you know you have accepted it when warning someone of an approaching cow, while shopping, has become common place.

Still, I find myself in amazement of the history, the people and the activity. As I take in the country I have been struck by the two extreme opposites that exist here. The ancient history, traditions, temples, the monarchy and then there is the impact of the modern world. It is like these two parts have collided and the chaos was born from it. I think the Indian people are faced with a choice. Let go of the past and embrace the future or remain in this chaos. Or, perhaps they can find a way to merge the two and truly create a unique and vibrant lives for themselves.



This photo of me was taken the other day in Jodhpur. We were in the Vishnu community and these children took a liking to me. They had many questions for me. Where was I from? What was my name? What was my religion? I had easy answers for the first two questions, but they did not understand that I had "no religion".

As our journey continues, I find I am more and more open to the culture and this experience. I had my difficult moments with this, accepting that people live in such poverty and filth. I was warned, before I left, but it is something you simply have to experience and then work out for yourself.

I have lots of pictures. I do not, however, have a way to get them off my camera! The picture posted above is one I took off Taren's blog. She has the whole set up so she can upload pictures. Check it out as we often have similar shots and she has some pretty good ones of me and her and our India trek.


Taren's Wander Lust Blog

Until I can blog again...

7 hours

I am ready to go. I think. I still feel like I have a cold and my anxiety level is so high, I needed a kick in the ass to get out of bed! I am packed and I have all the things I believe I need. Now, if I can just calm my nerves.

I think part of the anxiety is that I am not in control of when I leave. That is why I love road trips. You can get ready, take your time, and then leave whenever you want. I am also all worked up about the unknown. Actually, the truth is, I am worked up about losing all my creature comforts. I like my bed and my safe zone here in Toronto. I know my way around and I know what I need to do and when. Why would I leave all this comfort, to travel in a foreign place, where I can get sick from drinking the water? Oh, right, because you only live once and having some adventure, is good for the soul.

Apparently, this is exactly what I need. No doubt, in 2 days, I will be having a great time and all this will seem ridiculous. I am looking forward to seeing Taren and I am looking forward to the adventure. I guess I just wish the adventure could happen from the comfort of my own bed!

India Images

This picture triggered an old familiar feeling inside of me. It is a tipping point of sorts that can take me onto the road of depression. I am saddened by this picture because I imagine this man’s life to be sad. One wasted in poverty and uselessness (I just reread this and I wanted to point out that my comment is not the he was or is wasted and useless just that sometimes our lives can be... or at least it can feel or appear that way). It makes me remember that I wanted my life to be fulfilling and worth something. I think that I am going to make the choice not to be dragged down by the feeling. I will feel it and nothing more.

Next week at this time I will be in Delhi with a great friend of mine. I will see first hand how the second largest population on Earth lives. I will get sick at some point and get over it. I will be tired and up but not down. I will not be down because I will be having an adventure. Something I have wanted to do for a long time. I will take pictures of old sad men and I will think of ways to improve the human condition. Who knows, maybe when I get home I'll start a website.


Check out Jennifer Wells's blog on India (photo taken by Jennifer Wells) and Taren's on Thailand. But come back to mine and comment and read more things.

At Home

I am at home today. I have a day off and I am not feeling that well. I woke up in full denial passing off the cough and stuffy nose as nothing more than a bad thought in my head. Then I recalled a phrase by Eckhart Tolle, which in part is “what you resists persists!” So I decided not to resist. I admit, I have a cold and I have to be in tip top shape not only for dose two of the Dukoral but to get on the plane.

Lucky for me I have great friends. I am taking Alli-max and I bought some good food. I bought some junk food too; I can’t go cold turkey! I am staying in and I am working out the financially details of my trip. I have no idea how much money to bring, which of course, is a moot point considering I have a limited budget in the first place.

I want Rupees (INR), USD and some Euros. I also want to pay off my PC Mastercard and make sure I can pay the rent when I get back. All doable.

I am not looking forward to the 16 to 18 hours of travel time but I am looking forward to riding an elephant in Jaipur. I am also looking forward to seeing Taren. I am also looking forward to seeing if the ride from the airport to the hotel is as harrowing as Justin made it out to be.

In the immediate future, I am looking forward to getting better fast. I am all ready to go with the exception of the INR’s. My plan is to get those tomorrow after work or maybe even later today.

I think I will go and start packing!

India

I have been planning on tripping off to India (click the picture but come back and read my blog). I am leaving on November 7 for 21 days. I have asked everyone in asking range about India and what I should expect. I have had lots of advice and some great tips from everyone from the employees at MEC to famous world travellers (well one famous world traveller). I have purchased a small pharmacy, a new digital camera, cargo pants and more tissue than I would use in a year. I also have a rolling piece of luggage I borrowed. I am going to purchase a pair of Keen Sandals and that should set me on my way.

Since my Wanderlust friend started me off on this journey I have come to learn that India is overwhelming; I will return a different person. I tell myself that I am okay with that, when I consider the past few years a different person inside me will be welcome. I am also telling myself that I can manage the poverty and the dirty water. I am telling myself that I can accept another culture and I will be okay seeing dead cows floating down the Ganges. I am telling myself that armed with this information I will be able to avoid the meltdowns that others have had. I will walk in eyes wide and take in India’s amazing and ancient culture. I will be okay.

I wonder. Spain and one day in Morocco years ago will not compare. As I sit here typing this I am thinking about seeing the amazing sights. I cannot begin to imagine poverty on that level or the other things I have heard about. It is simply not part of my life experience. One well-travelled friend told me not to be one of those people that comes back and gets pissed at people that complain about their lattes. I will endeavour not too but I am not sure I can make any promises. I hope she can forgive me.

With exactly two weeks to go I am coasting into the experience. I am ready to go. I need to take the Dukoral vaccine tomorrow and then again in 7 days. I have all my shots; the Typhoid vaccine knocked me down but I am back up and ready. I am not sure there is anything else I can do to prepare.

My pictures coming soon and my Departures in 14 days and counting…

Responsibility

That title makes me want to crawl under a rock. Who really wants responsibility? It is really annoying. The thought of blaming someone else or our government is so tempting. The truth is it's all my fault. Sometimes we just do things without thinking of the consequences. Sometimes we act on impulse and sometimes it's just a lack of planning. Regardless, when you decide to take responsibility for every aspect of your life it is somehow painful and liberating all at the same time.

Imagine that. It's not the governments fault or your parents or some random stranger. It is your fault, or better still your responsibility. You may want to argue the point with me and feel free, I'll listen, but it is futile. Just accept the fact that it is your responsibility. The upside to that is that you have the power. You can choose to change directions.

On a larger scale what I find frustrating is that we make things more difficult for those of us that do take responsibility. We create rules and laws with the mistaken idea that these laws make it more difficult for the less responsible. The reality is it just causes the responsible more time and energy. Here is a news flash, the irresponsible don't care about our rules, they are after all, irresponsible. So, we can create laws and rules and do all kinds of things but the bottom line is if we don't hold ourselves and others accountable the entire exercise is moot.

Geez, where is all this coming from? Well I'll tell you. Last night I called the Toronto Parking Authority and had a vehicle towed off the property of the complex where I live. This unknown person had decided that he could park his vehicle anytime for hours on end in our courtyard. The vehicle blocked the entrance to our laundry room and an emergency access route. The person had been ticketed once before and given a warning letter. Still they park. What really got my goat was that many of my neighbours complained bitterly about this. Why did this person think they could park there? The rest of us have to pay to park on the property! What makes this guy think he can just pull up here, park his car and walk away?

The short answer is we do. We have not enforced our own rules. There is no accountability. So, I decided to take action instead of just being part of the whine and complain patrol. Why are we so afraid to take action? In the end I did. I had enough. The rules - no parking you will be towed away - are posted very large and very clear. On top of that, they were given a warning letter and ticketed once. So, last night I watched as the vehicle was lifted up and towed away. I did not feel good about it and if I encountered the person I would probably feel even worse, I am Canadian after all. But, when I think about it with a clear mind I know that this is what responsibility is. The courage to not only accept the consequences of our own actions but to stand and take action when required.

Is it cold?

I think my internal temperature gage is broken. This morning I noticed lots of people wearing coats. What's with that? I am walking around in a short sleeve polo style shirt and jeans wishing I had shorts on! I look to the men for cues on this as women are always freezing (my friend's wife used to crawl into my fire place to stay warm). The men are also all wrapped up! Coats on zipped to their throats some are even wearing woolly hats!

I must admit I packed a sweat shirt into my backpack just in case. But when I exited the subway at St. George I was glad I had not put it on. I found it quite warm on the subway. When I got to work the AC was off, why? I turned it on, although I will adjust it as the day goes on.

I have to say I wish I felt the cold. The AC is now off in my building at home and that makes for warm nights and uncomfortable days. I figure I wont be comfortable again until next May when the AC goes back on. It is far easier to warm up than cool down. Fans just blow hot air around and unless I want to buy and install an AC unit there is not much I can do.

So I sweat. Too bad that doesn't lead to weight loss!

Gay Marriage

I believe we are all equal. It's pretty simple. We are all human, therefore; we all have the same rights and freedoms. Of course my view is not shared across the board. I just read this article in The Toronto Star. I suppose you should be careful what you wish for. However, I do not really see what the issue is. They split all their assets and came to an amicable settlement. So move on. If you really want a divorce do what the Carnies do and ride the merry-go-round backwards.

In response to Andrea

Andrea, thank you so much for pointing out the other day at dinner that I have waffled on the Starbucks issue. Yes, about 4 months into my Chai free life I caved. When I went to Virginia in June I stopped into a Starbucks and that was fatal. The American Chai Latte was always a bit different in flavour and this small difference got me hooked all over again.

Therefore; Andrea, I have not saved any money. I have returned to my old ways; I am spending away my future on a 16oz steamed tea. Then, this morning, I dropped into the SB at Queen and Yonge. They were almost out of soy, however, the Barista said she had just enough....I was concerned. Then she pulled out SILK SOY! I was thrilled. They had to go out and buy soy to bridge the gap in their inventory and they bought the original Soy brand; Silk. Was I ever so excited to have my original drink!

Then I took a sip. It was a betrayal all over again Andrea, but in reverse! It just does not taste the same and same is what I am looking for. In this uncertain life I crave something that I can count on. I need to know that everyday I can get and enjoy the same drink I had enjoyed the day before. I don't want something new and different. New and different is for careers and cars. Same. I crave sameness and SB is messing with that.

So, Andrea, still I struggle. I would like to give it all up but I just can't. I toy with myself and say I will not have one until the weekend. But then something happens, like they ask me to work overtime. I say yes and then I need to the sameness of my Chai to work through the extra hours. Or, I get bored, which is fatal for me. I need to have or do something so I go get a Chai.

Today, I am already considering getting another Chai at lunch. I need to experience the sameness of the drink I love, or have come to love. Or is it the drink I have trained myself to love. I am not sure but regardless Andrea, I think we should leave that alone and accept and understand the need for sameness. Today at lunch I will set the world back on its axis, get the train back on track and set myself down the path of sameness by ordering a Chai with the new and different Soy.

Andrea, now that you understand my need for sameness I am sure you will refrain from pointing out the contradictions of my life. I realize I pour it all out here on my Blog but that does not mean you have to draw attention to my obvious flip flops. I am always up for close scrutiny and confrontation but not about me or my life. However, I understand why you would do what you did. If the tables were turned I would have done the same thing.

Pandas

I had to post these pictures. These Pandas are in China, safe and protected. The photgrapher is a friend of a friend, although I did meet him via Skype. Amazing pictures and more on his site.

Check out his site Adam Martin.

You know...

I just cannot seem to get interested in much these days. I look at The Toronto Star and The Globe and Mail but most of the articles have no appeal. I read the article on Pranknet and most of the comments as well. I also read the entire write up on The Smoking Gun as well. I am not sure what appealed to me about that story. The odd behaviour of the so called pranksters or the array of comments from the readers. Either way, I think, like most things it is a case of cause and effect or more specifically action and consequence. If you are going to trick people, be prepared for the backlash.

Still, for the most part I cannot get into reading the news. The political stuff just seems like the same old same old. Or maybe I just don't understand it. I also get tired of the same old debates. When are people going to get that we either have equal rights for all human beings or we don't? Right now we don't. It is that simple. Until we do people are going to fight for it, as we should. Why we don't is a mystery to me and leads me to conclude that we have not learned from our history.

The other thing I review is TMZ's website. I think that is a combination of boredom and the fact that it has small articles with pictures! I do this at work and short stories and pictures work well. I noticed this today on MJ and my friends and I are stumped. Who decided to have a MJ tribute concert in Austria? It seems rather random.

So, as I surf the web I feel very superficial. I cannot engage in all the debates over the economy (I am left wondering why we still listen to or care what the "experts" have to say. None of them had any idea of the obvious pending doom. And it was obvious. The timing may not have been the inevitability of it was. My friend and I figured it out about 6 years ago when we discussed sub prime mortgages). I do not really want to read about murders and yet another misuse of public funds. The strike is over so no more interesting things to read on that topic and that has left me browsing headlines and not finding much. Ho hum.

100 World Wonders

This caught my eye - Carlsbad Caverns. My Father liked caves and we once went to Ruby Falls. Which was cool for the falls, the cave and the fact that Ruby was one of my Dad's nicknames.

I am still checking out the 100 wonders to see before you die list. I do not think I have seen any of them....I have some work to do!

Update: I have been to 2 of the 100 places. Niagara Falls and San Fransisco.

Sunday at Work

When I have time on my hands I tend to do very little. I have spent most of the day, today, doing quizzes on the "How Stuff Works" website. I have only scored over 80% on one quiz, the tattoo quiz, which came as a surprise to me seeing as I do not have any. On the dog quiz I got 50%.....things that make you go hmmmmmmm, given my background. I did, however, score 80% on the dog breeding quiz, so perhaps that redeems me somewhat.

I have also looked at the pictures on Time Magazines website. They have some great pictures. It inspired me to want to go travel the world and check it out. Odd, because most of the pictures reflect the war and conflict that is going on; all those poor displaced souls in Pakistan.

Other than that I have been sitting here not doing much of anything. I am staying on top of things but not doing any thing that would propel me forward. I have two books with me but I do not feel like reading. One is on CSS, DHTML and AJAX. Not really up for studying. The other is a novel that is a bit tough to read so I am avoiding it - The Order of Good Cheer; I truly hope it gets better.

While I have been here it has poured rain and been nice and sunny. Makes me wonder what the walk home will be like. I am craving some good junk food from Noah's on Bloor. Not sure if I will wander out or not....maybe I will.

On Thursday I had the pleasure of meeting George Hunter and his Wife Pat. George is one of Canada's leading photographers and at 87 still has an iron hand shake. It was a great morning. My friend Barb, who brought me along, and I had the honour of looking through some of George's work. The man goes beyond talent (I have no idea what that means....what I am sayinig is I loved his work, truly incredible). He told us the story about his fall from an airplane. Lucky for George the struts on the airplanes wing saved his life. Despite falling out of the plane and finding himself caught by the struts, he did not let go of his camera! Both George and his camera made it safely back into the plane. My Father would have loved that story!




Check out George's website.

Oh the drama! When a business starts bugging you to pay up on your installments before it is due, or within a day of the due date, a little flag should pop up. I feel for the people impacted by this unscrupulous business woman but really, "she felt sick to her stomach and cried every day for a week after her less-than-ideal wedding." I guess it is really about the flowers and food!

Having said that, based on the Star's article Anna Parisotto is less than honest. If she was being upfront she would have called the Brides not sent emails - the cowards way. And she still could have offered her time to assist in finding supplies and help with the set up. I understand the stress of going out of business and the fine line that it sometimes creates. But like many things in life, how one handles these situations speaks volumes of our character.

Mental Note

Stop driving over 200 KPH.....

http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/article/678241

I was stressed when I had to go and deal with a speeding ticket. I was caught doing 28 over in an 80 zone. This guy is facing jail time!

CUPE Strike

I have to toss my 2 cents in regarding the Toronto CUPE Strike. Get back to work! I am not versed in all the issues but when it comes to sick days I do not support CUPE’s wish list. Sick days are there if you get sick. If you do not get sick, great you don’t need them. They are not yours to accumulate and then be paid out. Those are called vacation days. The following is from CUPE’s propaganda, which was given to me by a CUPE member:

Many of us have worked for decades on the understanding that we have a sick plan and would be paid for a portion of unused sick days when we retire. We believed the City’s promise.

I find it hard to believe that many of you were operating on a belief when you have a signed contract. Regardless, you do have a sick plan, if you are sick you are paid. Very few of us have that kind of plan!

The payout for accumulated sick days – which has stringent rules – is the only severance we receive when we retire from the City of Toronto, if we are eligible.

Again, I do not support the idea of accumulating sick days in order to have them “paid out” at a certain point. If you are sick those days are there, if you are not (sick) then move along they are not your days. When you retire you have a pension to live on. And although I am not sure, I imagine the CUPE pension is far better than the on I’ll be getting!

Local 416 and Local 79 members can only get paid sick time after six months of
employment.

So what’s your point? Most companies have wait times before benefits kick in. Why should the taxpayers of Toronto pay someone for sick days within the first 6 months of employment?

In Local 79, only full-time city workers have a payout provision. Members in the
city’s homes for the aged have paid sick days with no payout.

I am sure you have guessed my position on this one. The full-time city workers are lucky and two wrongs do not make a right!

About 10,000 part-time child care, public health, hostel and recreation workers
have no paid sick days at all. Local 79 has been trying for a decade to improve
this situation. Now we are fighting just to hold on to what is already there for
some members.

As a private sector employee I never had paid sick days. However, my employer used to manage sick days on a case-by-case basis. Having said that, I have no problem agreeing to a limited number of paid sick days, however no accumulation. Again these days are not earned by an employee they are a benefit. No one asks to accumulate other benefits like massage or dental coverage. Let’s just add up the benefits I did not use and then have them paid out to me!

You would have to work for 15 years without taking one sick day to earn the
maximum payout after 25 years of service. That means no illness, no having to
stay home to take care of a sick child or an ailing parent for 15 years.

Again, your point is? I think it is great that you can call in “sick” and then stay home and care for your child or parent. That is an amazing benefit that most of us do not share.

Full-time workers in Local 79 and Local 416 must work 10 years before they are
eligible for any payout. The percentage of banked sick days that will be paid
and the maximum to which they will be paid grows with the number of years of
service.

This is an awesome benefit that they should be grateful for. However, spreading this across CUPE is unrealistic and not something I am willing to pay for.

The proposal made by the city to replace our current provisions is a substandard
short-term disability plan.

Like most employees I think you should be offered a reasonable package either paid by your employer or a co-pay plan. If the STD plan is substandard then fight for a good one, which I am and I believe most Torontonians would get behind.

To wrap this up, if you want support then fight for something we can get behind. You have great jobs and you are paid well. The odds of you ever getting fired are slim. Your sick day requests are, simply, unacceptable.

I just watched this video on Global’s website. Ann Dembinski needs a wake up call. Her comments, referring to the Mayor, “if he has time to discuss the details of bargaining with 3 million Torontonians he should get himself to the bargaining table”. What was that Ann? The Mayor is obligated to inform us, the people who pay your salary and clearly he has been at the table. After hearing Ann I have even less support for CUPE.

When I walk past the CUPE workers with signs that say “We work for you Toronto”. I want to yell then get back to work! I do not want to pay you for accumulated days that you have not earned. I am willing to provide a fair and reasonable insurance plan that covers you if you get sick. But shake your collective head. No one gets accumulated sick days. You either use your insurance or you don’t and most of us hope we don’t! Now GET BACK TO WORK!

For the Sake of it

Today I am Blogging for the sake of Blogging. I am in that place of thinking I have nothing to say and if I do say anything I risk coming off as a whiner. The same old stuff coming from the same old stuff. Regardless, I think I might as well use some of the time, before I head off to work, to do some writing.

I am thinking of taking the plunge and starting a business. Nothing new, meaning no new ideas here, just figure I would get into some of the things I want to do but have yet to do. No time like the present! Of course, I worry about spending the money to register the business name. I worry about how I am going to get clients and I worry about whether or not I will be any good at the business I want to run. Worry worry worry, which we all know is useless. Still it has me in its grip.

I also want to start a business with a partner. I believe that a partner would keep me on track and in motion. Things must get done and when I am accountable to others, in most cases, I come through. Trouble is I have had no success in finding someone willing to take the risk with me. I may be onto someone now, but we have to make the time to get to it and I am not sure if that will happen.

In the past I ran a cleaning company with my sister. We worked well together and I would be into creating a family based business. That is tough because, well, lets just leave it at that. I asked my niece but I have not heard back and I often think about asking my nephews. I should but I haven’t.

So, there you go. This is what you get when I Blog for the sake of Blogging. I am confident in my ideas, I really do have great ideas, it is my execution that falls apart. Of course, that was yesterday and this is a new day.

Looking Back

I am sitting here listening to the song “unsent” which came up at a conversation this evening over dinner. I realized that I have very successfully shut out the past of my life. I can see into the great beyond and what happened but I have no clear sight lines and I feel disconnected from it all. In the muddle of memories I do recall the back porch of my house on Broadway. I loved the back porch. It was the place I sat with my Father and watched thunderstorms. It was the place my sister and I escaped to when being inside the house was more than we could handle. It was the same place my other sister joined us when she got home.

I remember raccoons joining us as well. And my Father so brave and unflinching as the raccoon and her family explored the porch and the possibility of breaking into the cage that housed my guinea pigs. I knew my little guinea pigs were safe; my Father was out there. I also remember watching TV out there and jumping the rocks in the rock garden instead of taking the stairs. My Mother frowned on that and one day I torn open my shin and understood her frown a little better. I also remember the glow of my Father’s cigarette and how thin he was and how strong he was.

I recalled him very clearly this evening while I was lying in bed. I was reading and for some reason, I think a cemetery scene in the book, I was taken to his place in the cemetery. I imagined going there and standing over his grave, silently willing him to answer my questions and tell me what to do. Then I would look over my shoulder and there he would be. In those pants that did not fit him, pulled tight with an old worn belt. He would be wearing the T-shirt with the picture of my niece on it; it was so worn out but he kept it and wore it. I had to stop myself, control the image because he was coming in so clear I thought just maybe I would get to see him again. I can hold that imagine in my mind but I am not ready to see him standing in front of me again. I would be swept away.

It takes some form of energy inside me to stand at the edge of this image and not let go. Like pushing down a scream you really want to release. Sometimes, when people leave you there is a space left there that time cannot fill. There are moments when you are unaware of it, you move along doing your thing and then suddenly there it is again, a gap where that person used to be. The phones calls you no longer receive, the jokes that go untold and the advice and support you want so much but cannot hear unless you stop, hold your hand up and listen real close.

I am only sure of this void, the void created by my Father’s death. I recall how the world was suddenly bigger and more dangerous and how I could not figure out why everyone was just going about their business. I remember wanting a day to pretend that it did not happen and having that taken suddenly when my cell phone rang. We had to bury my Father by sundown Monday so I had to meet my family at the funeral home. I do not recall a time, other than the evening before my Father died, that I ever publicly displayed with total abandon my raw emotions. I made a call to Mother and spoke to her threw a torrent of tears and anguish as I walked myself home. I feel that torrent now but it stays in its place inside.

I have no idea what this all means. Remembering. Being blocked from remembering. But I am thinking now of my Mother who, I am sure, would give anything to remember. Age is a cruel partner that walks within us all. It is almost 3am and I am awake. I am tired now and probably could drift off to sleep. I am not sure I will just yet. I need time to settle and perhaps a third bowl of Cap’n Crunch, comfort food to get me through to the morning. The AC is back on and working its magic inside my apartment. I am deeply grateful. Tonight, I will sleep under my comforter in the warmth of my dreams.

Late Night Cat Feedings

Last night I helped a friend of mine that is a volunteer for the Annex Cat Rescue. We went to China Town and Kensington Market and fed the feral cats. It’s fun but last night I was put off by the heat (see the next post) as I knew I could not seek relief at home as the AC was not working. The upside is the conversation as we walk/drive around feeding the cats. And I know I wont offend my friend when I say the cats are even better!

We saw quite a few (cats) and most of them are known to Rondi. I know some, but as I only help when Rondi needs it, my cat acquaintances are falling in number. Last night I met two new cats. One has an owner somewhere. The little guy is not “fixed” and is wearing a collar that, despite my attempts, I could not get off. His eye is infected as well and looks very bad. He is friendly but wary. Anyone want a cat?

The other guy I met is a large thin tom. He was a great cat and seriously had me considering, at least, fostering him until he found a home. He also needs to be “fixed”, which right now I cannot afford. I believe the ACR is going to attempt to trap him. He would make a fine pet cat as he is very friendly and just seems to want food and some lov’n!

It is amazing what lives among our concrete and garbage, the raccoons and cats and mice and rats, all running around the streets. I find the raccoons very endearing. The little ones are so cute and curious. They look at us as if they are saying “hey over here, leave us some too!”. We do, well Rondi does, sometimes I just want to get moving! As for the rats, I have a great time yelling RAT and watching Rondi scream and jump.

That was my Sunday night. It takes about 2 hours to do the route, feed the cats and take a bunch of pictures. I like it when the cats let me pet them. I like the conversation. I like walking down the back lanes of the Annex and commenting on how run down the place is. I do my best to avoid the stinky laneways and I am always grateful to get back in my car and turn on the AC!

Summer sweat - not so sweet!

I am just hot everywhere I go. It seems the past few days has been about sweating and being uncomfortable. I am not sure what I am suppose to learn from this experience, however, I am quite sure that if the heat was off in my building in December it would have been fixed over night! Not to say that I am resentful or bitter about living the past weekend without AC. I believe that what needed to be done was done.

It’s just that it occurred to me that I have not been able to cool off in what seems like days. I have had some moments; I spent Sunday afternoon in Starbucks reading. That was cool. But I sweat when I get to work and I am sweating when I get home. I am warm lying bed and then I begin to sweat when I sit to watch TV! I think it began with the shock of heat I got when I arrived in Virginia Beach. I left Toronto and it was about 22 and I got to VB and it was 37! I have no idea how they cope with that day in and day out.

Being overweight does not help either. I am carrying around an extra 20 pounds at least. I am sure that makes me sweat. I decided that once the AC is working again I will start to ride my bike. That was a great way to put off riding my bike! Of course, it appears that the time has come. The AC is working again, although I am not sure it is in my unit. It either has not worked its way to my place or my unit is now broken. I’ll find out when I get home. If it is working maybe I’ll go out for a bike ride!

This is why I look forward to winter. I am a “sweater” and I need the cool cold air to keep the water in my body! If the heat went off in my building I would not even notice. I turned it on once last winter when the temperature dropped in December. I used it for about 2 days and turned it back off. This is also why I have no qualms using the AC full tilt all summer long. I make up for that in the winter when I use zero energy to heat my home. Even steven if you will.

Fish Tank Frenzy

I discovered, today, a new edition to the fish tank family, a very tiny new member. I am assuming that Etta Mae and Archie had children. I am not sure, as I do not know if the little guy is theirs or the algae eaters. It is so damn tiny I cannot figure it out. The other scary thing is is that Etta Mae is pretty bent of eating the little gaffer. I have been watching Brothers and Sister Season 1. Etta Mae must have been watching too and no doubt she wants no part of a large family. The poor dear, if only I could explain the joys of it all to her.

As I watched the little guy swimming around Etta Mae made a mad dash to consume him. I thought she actually nailed him but to my relief she did not. It took me most of the afternoon to confirm that however, and at this point I, again, cannot find the little guy. It is really tough to spot him. He can get into the gravel and the plants not to mention the little houses. I pray for him, I would love for him to survive and grow, become a contributing member of the fish tank. Of course, my thought after that was it will be that much more difficult for any future new members. Not only will Mom and Dad be after them but so will big brother!

American Idol - Thank God it's over!

The show was predictable. I think everyone I spoke to about it said the same thing. They will start with the top 10 and they did, well the top 13. Then they launched into guest singers, no surprise there. The surprise for me was that it felt good to see the top 13 again. I had forgotten about the Latin guy. I also found myself missing the crazy Puerto Rican chick (Tatiana what a great bit!). It was like being reunited with old friends. I guess that is how they get us. They let us into their lives so we want to go see them when they tour. But the truth is I am not interested in paying to see them. They aren’t that good. That set with Fergie confirmed it for me. Then being subjected to Megan Joy, that just puts the final nail in that coffin. Man no wonder she was voted off, she sucks. Oh well, it saves me the drive to Hamilton!

About the Judges

Simon is great. He says what I, and Nameless, were often thinking. Simon gives good feedback. The person receiving it, if they can see it for what it is, can grab hold of it and actually improve. Paula, well I love her so who cares that she rarely has anything to offer. Kara, well I lost respect for her near the beginning when she trashed her greatest fan. It was a pretty low move and it stuck with me. Randy is Randy. Funny, seems down to earth but again not sure he really offers anything that the performers can use to their advantage. “I mean, look, listen, dog you the dude!”

I also wonder how they get the former winners to go back on that stage. Would they not want to be as far away from it as possible? Maybe I am just cynical, but I was thinking they must go back out of some sense of obligation. Or the shows producers are smart enough to put it in the original contract. Imagine, what you would sign to get on the show and live out your dreams?

Yeow! Then they hit us with those award skits. Is this something they have done in the past? I think not as it was rather pathetic. I guess I expected more. Am I jaded? Have I seen too much and I need more like some kind of junkie? Or am I just not that impressed with this average, playing it safe, show. I mean, “we are the champions” how old and done is that!

I also wondered who called in what favour to get Queen Latifah on the stage with Lil Rounds. Not to mention the other “Stars” that have sunk to this level. That sing song with Jason (I have no idea who he is; am I suppose to know???) was bad bad bad. That is why what’s his name and what’s her name were voted off the stage. That is also why I cannot recall their names. At least I have that to console me; I will return to normal after this evening.

Kiss and Adam. That was something. I will say again Adam is truly an artist. I am not sure I can get past the screeching, which means I doubt I would go see him live or buy his CD but I appreciate his artistry. Actually, I would buy his CD and see him live. After all I have been moaning about how they are all the same. Adam is not the same that’s for sure.

I cannot figure out why people put themselves out there to be ridiculed. Katrina really, it is not worth it honey. It wont build a career, believe it or not even people in Hollywood can tell the difference between a fool and someone that is serious about their craft. Have some dignity. On the other hand, if someone waved a nice cheque in front of me I might just take the blue pill too.


So, Kris wins the show and it does not really surprise me. I did not think that Americans had it in them to vote for Adam. He was way ahead of the pack and a very unique performer. For the most part we want we are comfortable with. The cute looking pop singing Kris. So that is what we get, mediocrity. Ok, I am bored now and it is time to move onto better things.





I am so glad the show is over. I lost interest a few weeks back and for the most part I only watch out of habit. I just cannot commit to TV. I get bored and antsy and I find myself wandering off. Before I go any further I must give a salute to Allsion and Cyndi. Great performance and I love Allsion. I will go see her when she has her own tour. So that is it. It is done and I can go to bed now. I can forget that I was hooked this year, hooked by watching the auditions one episode more than I should have. Hooked because I tuned in during the Hollywood week instead of banging my head against a wall. Next year please remind me to find a good sturdy wall.

I am sitting here listening to the last performance by Danny on AI. I watched the show tonight on mute while I spoke to a great friend of mine. I saw the reaction to Kris and Adam being declared “safe” and my call ended in time for Danny’s good by tune. I must say, I was bored with the whole thing and I missed the show last night. I have renewed interest now, as I really want to see who wins the show.

I thought it would be Danny and Kris facing off, as I did not think the masses would vote for Adam. I know he screeches, and my sister cannot stand him, but I think he is incredibly artistic. I also thought that Danny would appeal more to the masses, as does Kris. So, surprise for me that Adam is safe.

Flashing back for a moment I must say I was sad to see Allison leave the show. I was not however, surprised, as I do not think she is the one to win. What a talent and I admire her courage and I really like her. I have said that many times over the past AI Blogs. She will no doubt go on to bigger and better things. That assuming she does not self destruct in some manner.

Here we are then, with the top 2, Adam and Kris. I will be watching next week, both shows. Whether or not I comment on here who knows. Like I said I was fast losing interest. It has been an experience watching the show, it is my first time but it is one I would not repeat. I do not like getting into TV, I feel sucked dry by it all. Having said that I have also liked watching the auditions so who knows maybe I’ll be doing this all over again in Season 9!

American Idol

Tonight 4 singers so the show is not as difficult to sit through.

I would not be surprised if he does not win the show. He is good, I appreciate his artistic ability but I think that will also go against him. People like what they know. They know Danny and they know Kris. I have a feeling one of those two might just win. I enjoyed his performance although it is still a bit tough to listen too. It’s that screeching voice of his it grates on me sometimes. I will add that I think he is very natural on stage. It is like he has always been on stage, born too it.

I really enjoy her. At her age I think she is incredible. I do not think she will win and that is an experience thing. She is not at that level but know doubt she will be as she continues after the show. I would love to meet her and give her a hug. I feel like I know her!

This performance was a bit flat. That song is gritty and sexy and hard-core and Kris was not. I think you have to have a tough hardcore attitude to pull off that song. Overall I like Kris, he has an easy voice to listen too. I think he could win the show.

It did not work for me. I give him credit for the middle part of the song where Danny can really sing. The do’op crap, what was that? It is rock and roll not jazzy pop do’op do’op do’op! That alone loses my vote. And, yes he went for it but I think he missed the mark, I cringed a bit when he screamed out the last note. Overall, I have liked Danny’s performances but not so much tonight.

The duets are a great idea. It is a really good way to compare their ability. I disagree with Simon however, Kris was better than Danny. They did sound great together. Adam and Allison, I am not in agreement with the Judges. That duet was safe and boring. I am not sure what those judges see; the best duet was Kris and Danny.

Now for the boot show. This is tough; I would say a toss up between Danny and Allison. It would not surprise me if Adam is in the bottom but I say it should be Allison and Danny and based on tonight’s performances, Danny should be gone.

My 2 cents, share yours in the comments!

American Idol

Well Folks, I missed the show tonight. I got called into work last minute and then went for dinner. The AI site does have the performances online yet; hopefully I can catch them tomorrow before the boot show.

Last week I was on the edge of my seat. I could not believe that Allison was in the bottom 3. It should have been Matt. I do not look at their performance in isolation, I think you have to consider what the contestant has done throughout the competition. Therefore; Matt should have been back in the bottom 3. It all worked out in the end, with Anoop and Lil leaving the show.

Lil is a good singer, but there is something missing. I cannot put my finger on it. I just don’t get into her performances. I find myself wandering off to do the dishes. Anoop, well he was so hot and cold it was time for him to hit the bricks. Even though I have not seen the performances, I think the bottom 3 should be Matt; my beloved Allison and Kris. Of the three Matt should go.

I’ll watch the videos when I can and if I change my mind, I’ll let you know.

Tonight on American Idol

Who was up first? Give me a minute…oh right Lil Rounds, a totally forgettable performance. I got about 3 or 4 contestants down and thought who was first? Oh right…wait a minute who was it again?

Kris was great; I really do enjoy his singing. He makes a song his own and of course, he is easy on the eyes.

Danny was not on it tonight. I thought he was boring, although I would not put him in the bottom 3. I guess Disco is just not his thing.

Adam. Wow, what can you say? Nameless summed it up with “this is a competition for second place”. Adam is so far ahead of the pack that if he stopped and sat around for 2 weeks it would make no difference. The rest of them will never catch up.

Allison is just awesome. She can do no wrong. If I were 16 I would be all over her, if she said yes of course. She looked great, put on a good act and she always goes for it. Cara no one cares that Donna Summer won a Grammy for that song. What has that got to do with anything? Sum up Allison's performance and let us move on.

Matt, not bad tonight, much better actually. The scales are tipping between Matt and Danny tonight.

Anoop. I agree with Simon, Anoop just does not cut it. Nameless asked the question, what do the other judges hear? There is a clear bottom 3 and it is no different than last week. I must add here that I did like Anoop’s new look. However, it was a bad performance, he blew and I am left wondering who votes for him. Not many with all those bottom 3’s but he hasn’t been booted yet, perhaps Wednesday night?

Overall, I am glad all the judges are back. It makes a huge difference to hear them all, even though Randy and Cara don’t often say anything. Just lots of blah blah yadda yadda. Paula is not far behind, but I like her and she looked great tonight. Simon, is always bang on. He tells the truth and offers some credible feedback.

So, tonight’s bottom 3:

Musical interlude

This is a great song. Nellie has a great voice, so does James.

I must admit I also like Britney. Well, I like some of her songs. Circus is a pretty good one and so is If You Seek Amy. Apparently, this means you want to get fucked. I am not sure how "if you seek amy" translates into that but I was told that by someone in the know. Maybe someone can explain that to me.

Now lets see, what other songs can I put here for your musical pleasure.

Elton John. Tiny Dancer, what a great song. Most Elton songs are great. Here is another one, This Train Don't Stop There Anymore. This classic EJ and I love this song. Of course, I cannot mention EJ without having a link to Bennie and The Jets. Great retro video from Soul Train. This song is from the move Aloha Bobby and Rose. My sister Chana and I sat through it several times, we loved the movie and the song. We also sat through Death Race 2000 several times. I am not sure what this says about us but we don't care we will always have those two movies and that song.

Okay, a couple of final tunes I have to get to bed. This song is by Linkin Park. It is called In the End and it is true. This live version is not the greatest but it gives me hope; I think I could be a Rap Artist! Here's a tune you may not know. It is from a band called Chalk Circle. I liked them and I actually met the lead singer in a poetry class I took in the 80's or maybe it was the early 90's. Check it out, This Mourning. This last one is a romantic song, it plays to that side of me. I am really a hopeless romantic. Years ago I heard a song and watched the video and it was called Walk Away Joe. I loved the song and honestly I have no idea if this is the same song but it will do. Trisha Yearwood - Walk Away Joe.

I just watched this video again and it really is not romantic. I say we get a gang together and hunt Joe down. We can kick him around a bit before we get all mushy and sappy and forgive him and go through it all again. What sorry saps we are, well most of us anyway. It brings back the memory of my walk away Joe, the Bastard. They say it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I say poppycock to that. I prefer the saying:

If you love something set it free; if it comes back it's yours. If it doesn't, hunt it down and kill it!

Enjoy the tunes and maybe be tell me one or two of your favourites.

American Idol...bad save

They used the save! What a waste. I would have held off until next week; next week is the critical week. They had the right bottom 3 this week, losing any one of them would not have hurt the competition. Next week the bottom 3 would have been a bit more difficult. My guess for next weeks bottom 3 would have been, Anoop, Lil and Kris. But let’s say it ended up being Danny? Danny would be a far better choice to save. In the end it may not matter because we may end up with the same bottom 3 as tonight. We will lose two of them and continue on. Poor use of the save, they may have well just used it on Scott.

I also think that Cara and Paula should at least pretend that are impartial. They are supposed to be judges and I think their antics influence voters. Randy and Simone play it cool while the woman sway and swoon. Pull it together! Having said that, I read and agree with an article arguing that the new arrangement in judging does not work. Simone is the only judge that has something valuable to say almost all the time. His assessments can make or break a competitor. The way it rolls now it works against the competitors that Simon does not judge and is even unfair. The better solution is to tell Cara, more so than Paula, to shut up. I have no doubt Ryan can handle that. I also support the bandwagon to ditch Cara. she lost my respect very early on and usually has nothing of value to offer.

This “boot” show is too long and boring. Last night I joined Skype and at least had the company of “Nameless” via videoconference. We both agreed that we could do without all the other acts. She switched over to Lost during the singsongs. I say cut the show to 30 minutes and get to the point. Do the Ford commercial, because I understand they need to generate revenue for the show and Ford! Then sit someone on the metal stool then do the big show tune number and then sit two more. One more commercial break and then cut the person lose and let us go to bed. That way I would be spared sitting through Myley’s tinny thin little sing along. What has any of this got to do with the picture of Kris? Well, if you have to ask why I would post a picture of Kris, you are either straight or blind!

Finally, I am not sure the save rule makes any difference. I thought I was there to save a competitor that was voted off for some unknown reason. Example, everyone figured they were safe so they did not bother to vote. That wont matter until the final 4 or 5 so having the save rule that is must be used before the bottom 5 made it redundant. This coming week will be interesting as 2 will be leaving. It should be some combination of last night’s bottom 3 but who knows….

People At Large

I was heading home after work and I saw this guy walking through the PATH. I attempted a picture so he could grace the pages of my Blog but I was not prepared. I captured this blurry image we I can now refer to as art.

Once I was outdoors I spotted this guy and thought he would make a great replacement for the first guy. I thought they both looked great from behind. The bald guy looked like a tough guy (I caught a glimpse of him) but who knows. Anyway, they both dress better than yesterdays Person at Large.

For one final picture I thought I would capture Adelaide Street looking eastbound at around 4:50pm. Funny thing is without my knowledge Nameless (you know my friend from the AI Recaps) and yet another friend of mine were on the other side of the street. They could be in this picture somewhere…